Have you met a Shag user and instead of being happy you are feeling nervous about having sex on the first date? Well, it is normal to be nervous before meeting someone in person, the problem comes when those nerves win the game to pleasure. That is when sexual anxiety and fear of sex appears.
What is sexual performance anxiety?
Sexual performance anxiety is a variant of anxiety, and anxiety is a useful defense mechanism that the mind uses to alert the body about a danger, through a symptomatology that seeks to indicate a person that this situation or stimulus poses a risk and should move away from it.
The problem for emotional health occurs when anxiety affects the person in situations that do not really pose a danger or great risk, or that appears with such frequency and intensity that they do not allow them to develop a normal life in a happy way.
Sexual anxiety is the one that occurs around sexual intercourse, either before or during them, and does not allow the patient to enjoy their sexuality. |
How does sexual anxiety affect the life of the person who suffers it?
Sexual anxiety affects a person’s sex life, as well as their confidence and self-esteem. The person with this problem does not enjoy his or her sexuality. He is scared of sex and instead of seeking sex avoids it.
Consequently, men and women feel loss of sexual desire, anorgasmia, lubrication problems or problems to maintain an erection, which causes problems during sexual intercourse and therefore further fuels this anxiety.
This type of anxiety has the added problem of affecting the couple’s relationship, which can be resented if there is not good communication and support.
Symptoms of sexual performance anxiety
Symptoms of sexual anxiety performance – also known as sexual anxiety disorder – are like a good restaurant menu. Inmensely varied.
In addition, they occur more frequently when someone is meeting a new sexual partner. Thus, you will feel to a greater or lesser extent some of these symptoms:
● Tachycardia
● Difficulty breathing
● Dizziness
● Instability
● Tremors
● Dry mouth
● Abdominal pain
● Body tingling
● Feeling of losing control or unreality
● Cervical tension
These symptoms usually occur especially before, during and after sexual intercourse. Symptoms can also occur in the patient just thinking or considering the fact of having sex.
Causes of sexual anxiety disorder
Sexual anxiety can remain in the life of the patient for a more or less longer period of time time, as well as attack intermittently every time a new sexual partner is met.
Thus, the main causes of sexual anxiety are:
● Lack of security and confidence: being self-conscious about your physique plays a very important role. People who are dissatisfied with the appearance of their genitals or with their body in general are more likely to have sexual anxiety. It is also caused by the fear of not meeting the expectations of the partner in the sexual field or of not being able to enjoy them, such as not being able to reach an orgasm.
● Sexual dysfunctions: having suffered some sexual dysfunction in previous relationships, such as erectile dysfunction (we will talk about this later), lack of lubrication and pain in sexual intercourse, premature ejaculation, vaginismus or anorgasmia, can also cause this fear of sex in new encounters.
● Stress: during periods of time when you are worried about something and stressed in some areas of your life, you can also develop sexual anxiety.
● Relationship problems: lack of communication or trust with the sexual partner are the most frequent problems that cause sexual anxiety.
● Emotional problems: patients who are going through deep emotional times, who do not know how to manage their emotions well, who have had a toxic relationship or who have not received a good sexual education, may present sexual anxiety when confronting a new partner.
How to get over sexual performance anxiety
Let’s be honest, to know how to overcome sexual performance anxiety, it is best to see a specialist. A psychologist specializing in sexology would be the right thing to do.
However, we are going to suggest some lines of action:
● Be open with your sexual partner and encourage yourself to talk about the concerns that keep you from acting freely during sex. Thus, your partner will be able to understand you better and you can even look for solutions together that, after all, will unite you even more.
● Try to expand intimacy, there are many ways to do it without penetration. The foreplay preliminaries are a good example of this. For example, you can give yourself massages or take a warm bath, caress each other and find new ways to feel and provoke sensations, without having to get to the sexual act that stresses you so much. There are, in short, many sexual games that do not need penetration.
● Exercise. It will not only keep you fit and help you feel better about your body but also have more energy and strength for sex.
● Distract yourself and look for external stimuli to help you direct your attention away from the sexual act. For example, you can put on music or think of things or situations that stimulate you.
If none of this works, ask for psychological help, as we have indicated above. Consult a professional who specializes in sexual problems who can help you understand your fears about sex and understand what worries you or causes anxiety in you, as well as to feel more comfortable with your sexuality.
How to improve erection
One of the most frequent sexual dysfunctions and the one that causes the most anxiety about sexual performance is erectile dysfunction.
An erection disorder is a problem that happens to all men at some point in their lives and like many other problems, there are many causes that help their appearance. The good news is that it is possible to have a good erection in most cases.
Even so, although the problem can be solved, it should not be ignored, because erection problems cause -in addition to problems getting and maintaining an erection- all kinds of associated problems, such as lack of self-esteem, sleep problems, depression and a long etcetera.
How does an erection work?
According to Wikipedia:
“The penis contains two chambers called the corpora cavernosa and corpus spongiosum, which run the length of the organ. A spongy tissue fills the chambers. The two chambers are surrounded by a membrane, called the tunica albuginea. Spongy tissue contains smooth muscles, fibrous tissues. The albuginea helps trap blood in the corpora cavernosa and corpus spongiosum and thereby sustains the erection. When the penile muscles contract to stop the inflow of blood and open the outflow of the canals, the erection is reversed.”
What are the causes of erectile dysfunction?
The causes of erectile dysfunction are many, including physical problems like diabetes, heart disease, obesity, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, and even sleep disorders. Medications taken to deal with other health problems can cause erectile dysfunction, just like alcohol, tobacco, and other drugs.
In fact, mixing sex and drugs does not usually have good results, with honorable exceptions such as CBD.
But erectile dysfunction is also caused by mental health problems, such as anxiety, depression, stress, and relationship problems. That is why visiting a doctor for erectile dysfunction treatment is so valuable.
If ignored, erectile dysfunction can lead to complications such as an unsatisfactory sex life, low self-esteem, high anxiety, and relationship problems. Getting a partner pregnant also becomes difficult if a man suffers from erectile dysfunction.
At this point, you may wonder why you don’t have a partner without being honest with yourself and accept that your sex life was quite poor.
Solutions for erection problems
When nothing works, you can resort to medication, but first try the natural solutions for erection problems that we offer below.
By the way, do you know how many side effects they have? None.
Exercise
There are many lifestyle changes that are remedies to increase libido in men and thus improve erectile dysfunction but among them, exercise is the treatment that can have the biggest impact.
Exercise works on several fronts to combat the causes of erectile dysfunction and help reverse them.
Exercise improves blood flow, which is vital for a strong erection, and improves blood pressure by increasing nitric oxide in the blood vessels, which is exactly how Viagra works.
Weight-bearing exercise can increase natural testosterone production, an important factor in the quality of erections and sexual desire.
Bottom Line: Exercising is one of the best natural remedies to combat the causes of erectile dysfunction, no matter how old you are.
Eat well
The foods you eat can have a direct impact on erectile dysfunction. A diet rich in fruits, vegetables, whole grains, and fish, and with fewer servings of red meat and refined grains, reduces the risk of erectile dysfunction.
A healthy diet also helps maintain a healthy body weight, which is important because overweight men are 50 percent more likely to have erectile dysfunction than men of a healthy weight.
In addition, obesity increases the risk of vascular disease and diabetes, two factors that contribute to erection problems.
Sleep well
Poor sleep patterns can be a contributing factor to erectile dysfunction. A review published in the journal Brain Research emphasized the intricate relationship between the level of sex hormones such as testosterone, sexual function, and sleep, noting that testosterone levels rise with improved sleep and lower levels are associated with sexual dysfunction.
Hormone secretion is controlled by the body’s internal clock, and sleep patterns probably help the body determine when to release certain hormones.
Adhering to a set sleep schedule is another of the natural remedies for erectile dysfunction that can help ensure that those signals are clear and consistent.
Stop smoking and drinking alcohol
For many men, smoking is a problem when it comes to maintaining an erection.
Particularly when erectile dysfunction is the result of vascular disease. This occurs when the blood supply to the penis is restricted due to blocked or narrowed arteries.
On the other hand, with regard to alcohol, although it can help to have sexual relations due to its disinhibiting power, it can also make it difficult, since it is also one of the great causes of erectile dysfunction.
The central nervous system is responsible for releasing nitric oxide, a chemical essential for producing and maintaining an erection, and excessive alcohol consumption depresses the central nervous system, causing it to work less efficiently. Lack of nitric oxide results in erectile dysfunction.
Conclussion
Most of the causes of sexual performance anxiety are solvable, so if you have this kind of problem, get to work and you will see how, in a very short time, you will improve radically.
