When you meet girls you can sometimes feel the chemistry of the first meeting right away: the two of you click. It is a sign that you may be on the verge of a compatible relationship… since that chemistry is one of the early signs of a good relationship.
Other times it can be difficult to know if things are happening the way you want them to. So when in doubt, how do you know if she’s a good fit for you? This becomes more and more important the more dates you have. Here’s a quick guide on how to know if you should move on or step aside.
Compatible relationship: shared sense of humor
Our sense of humor says a lot about who we are as people. So if you meet a woman and the two of you have a shared sense of humor, you probably have a lot of other things in common. In fact, it is recommended that guys start talking to girls in a humorous way. Humor relaxes social interaction and nervousness and can be a great social lubricant in general. It won’t completely fuel a relationship, but it can get it going and spark dating chemistry.
If you both have a sense of humor in common, you probably have a lot of other things in common. Humor is primarily based on a shared view of the world, as well as shared cultural references. Think about it: don’t you have a similar sense of humor as most of your friends? Friendship is the test that shows a compatible relationship.
Compatible relationship: everything you need to know
Do the two of you get along? Do you like spending time together? Is there an emotional connection there? All of this is important when it comes to chemistry. You must enjoy spending time together. If it becomes a chore, you might as well go ahead and try to find women with whom you have that kind of connection.
Moreover, how does your conversation flow? Do you guys always have something to talk about or is the conversation forced and awkward? The former is a good sign of chemistry, while the latter is clearly not.
The clearest sign of love compatibility: Sexual Spark
Let’s not beat around the bush: if there’s no sexual spark between the two of you in the beginning, it probably won’t grow later. There being a sexual spark does not mean that there is love, but if there is love compatibility it is easier for there to be good sex. So, if you are not very interested in each other, the relationship does not have much future. It’s better to use your time getting to know other women, regardless of the kind of emotional connection you may have with her.
Once you really start getting into things, it’s time to start talking about the sexual side of things between the two of you.
How compatible are we?: Shared values
Surely you have asked yourself at some point the question: how compatible are we? Shared values are necessary for the relationship to work in the long term, although they may not be as important in the short and medium term. So if you’re wondering about the long run, it’s time to start thinking about whether or not the two of you have shared values.
You can also read: how to pleasure a girl
It doesn’t matter if you want to marry her and have children or things like that; it’s just that the lack of shared values can start to create serious friction within the couple once they decide to get into something more serious and pass the first month mark. Then you will realize that you are not in a compatible relationship.
Compatible relationship: convergent life project
This is one of the most important points. Compatible couples have convergent life projects. They don’t have to be the same, but they do take place, at least most of the time, in the same city.
You may love your job and dedicate many hours to your work, it may be the same for her. Well, no problem, as long as you’re okay with that lifestyle. Let’s see the opposite case.
You love to travel and you want to make a travel blog and dedicate yourself to it, but your partner cannot be away from her family for a long time and, in fact, she doesn’t. Nor can she be absent from her job for more than one month a year and she is not willing to quit it.
That relationship is doomed to failure because, even if you have a partner, you will feel alone most of the time and no matter how much love there is at first you are not in the group of compatible couples, get the idea.
The clearest sign of a couple’s compatibility: mutual respect
This is another very important criterion that we must look at to know if it is compatible love. Respect is the basis of any relationship, and of course, in the specific case of love it is paramount.
Thus, it is not enough that there are no direct physical or verbal aggressions. The day to day way of relating to the other must be consistent with the value of respect, and in a sustained manner over time.
The latter is very important, because even in relationships in which there is abuse, there can be a cycle of violence in which repentance is shown in a timely manner but, shortly after, the attack returns.
Compatible couples have fluid communication
Also of paramount importance. Most relationship problems come from a lack of communication. If you can’t talk about your feelings, bad business. This includes fears, hopes, disagreements, but also being able to apologize when you do something wrong.
Everyone lies from time to time, but if the lies are constant… there’s a meaning to that.
You may not be part of a compatible couple.
Give and receive spaces of freedom
Couples who are able to give each other freedom without problems are highly compatible.
You may have a hobby that she doesn’t like, but she can be fine with you doing it alone or with friends. It may happen the other way around.
The fact is that if you give yourselves spaces of freedom without the other party and that you are fine with it, then you know that she is a good partner for you.
Give in
Nobody is the same as you are. All people are unique. That is why it is impossible to be 100% compatible. That is why you have to give in.
Maybe she’s a neat freak and you’re messier than a baboon rave, but you love each other for some strange reason. Well, she will have to give in a little on the issue of order and you will also give in and start being more orderly.
The ideal is that you find an intermediate point in which both of you are comfortable. That’s what I’m talking about when I talk about giving in. To look for relationship compatibility.
So, now that you can tell if you are in a compatible relationship it’s time to see if living together is a good idea.
Moving in together, tricks to live as a couple
Living together can be wonderful… or a nightmare, it will all depend on two things: the couple’s compatibility and the ability of each of the members to yield.
Because, ordering a pizza while choosing your next Netflix movie can be great, but if she only eats pineapple and anchovies, and watches polish romantic comedies, living together (in the long run, in the beginning everything is cheery) can get complicated.
Are you ready to move in together with your partner?
You should know it’s like being married. The only difference being there’s no marriage contract.
Living together with your partner as a couple is not easy, but it doesn’t have to be complicated either. How much time you have been going out together is not really that important, if you move in with your partner you will learn a lot of things in very little time: to begin with you’ll see if you’re compatible living together, if you have a future.
One thing is certain: if you cannot live together with your partner now, you can hardly think later will be different. People, as a general rule, don’t change. If you’re messy now, you will continue being so when you move in.
You can make an effort to change, and you will manage some things, but you will never be as organized as a naturally organized person is. So, it might be better to find out these things quickly, so you don’t waste time.
Am I telling you to move in with your partner as soon as possible? Yes, that is exactly what I’m saying.
Life is short and there’s only one. It’s better to know things sooner than later.
Living together: 5 bits of advice
Living together everything can be simpler or more complicated at the same time. The thing is that there’s only way to know which of the two it will be… yes, you guessed it: living together.
So here is some advice:
1. Both members should be independent
You might have moved in with your partner, but even if you’re living together you should each have your own space. If any of the two – or both – is not able to have a good time when the other is not there, an unhealthy dependency will be established, and this will complicate living together in the long run, at least with quality time.
2. Don’t take your relationship for granted
When couples find themselves living together, they might believe that the fact of moving in together means their relationship is more solid, which can be true but, on the other hand it might be a false sense of security.
By contrast, with too much frequency, the intimate gestures, the spontaneous acts of love will be disregarded and substituted by bills, problems and pointless quarrels.
You have to pay attention and be ready to remedy this.
3. You need to be friends
Couples love friendship and erotism. With only one of these, you will not be able to live together as a couple.
Friendship is the foundation when it comes to living together. Friends are there to listen, you help them when you can and you forgive their mistakes. True friendship is like true love: selfless.
Only when you yield, when you accept certain behaviors of the person you are living with that you don’t like, you will have a satisfactory life as a couple.
That men and women cannot be friends is not true. Friendship between them can and must exist.
4. Keep communication open with your partner
Always. Under any circumstance. When you stop communicating you will start with misunderstandings and resentments. When you feel you cannot express yourself, if you feel embarrassed or scared, when you don’t listen or feel you’re not being listened to, everything crumbles down.
Communication is vital for a healthy and constructive life together as a couple.
5. Above all, equality
Equality above all, and for everything. And I don’t just mean with house chores or the kids (if that were to come along). What I mean is that there has to be an overall balance when living together.
If that were not the case, within the couple living together there would be one who would always have the upper hand, one will be dominant and the other will be submissive. That might work as a sexual fantasy, but not as relationship dynamics.
Moving in together: pros and cons
All the important things in life are good and bad at the same time. Living as a couple is one of them.
It all depends on who you are and what you want, on having a personal life project that can be compatible with the life project of the person you’re moving in with and on being a compatible cohabiting couple.
As my grandma used to say: “nothing is true or false, everything depends on the colour of the lens through which we look”.
Here are a number of advantages:
1. You will spend more time together
Which means you will have more opportunities to enjoy your loved one’s company. You can begin projects together, or do the things you enjoy with her.
When you are not living together there are times when just seeing each other can be a problem due to schedules, distance or many other circumstances.
Living together you know that sooner or later she will be home. You know that even if you get home late, someone will be there.
2. Your economies will merge in different ways
This means you will share bills, the rent, electricity, water, the car… It is a significant saving. In this sense a cohabitation agreement in which these costs are detailed can come in handy.
3. You will get to know your partner better
Sharing a house with someone is the best way to get to know that person, with the only exception of travelling. Spending time together, especially intimate time, you will get to know things about your partner which are impossible to know any other way.
4. You will mature
Moving in together is a decision normally taken by adults. But not all adults have grown up.
Living together with another person will make you mature no matter what. Making decisions together, adapting to the other person’s routines, facing your loved one’s hard times, making a team against the world… all these things make you toughen up.
Lets see the cons now
1. You will spend more time together
Even when you don’t feel like it. That’s what living together has. If you argue, you either go take a walk outside or share the same roof.
Even if the house is big, even if it’s a mansion, the environment will be awkward.
On the other hand, there are times when you want to be alone, or alone with your friends without having argued beforehand.
That’s what it boils down to, you are living under the same roof.
2. Your economies will merge in different ways
Which means she will know what you do with your money at all times. Not because she is spying on you, it’s just that you are living together, she’ll simply know.
Say goodbye to your financial independence.
3. You will get to know your partner better
So much. In very little time you’ll learn she farts, that she pulls the blanket away, that she watches your most hated TV programme, that she cooks as bad as Chernobyl people, that… the list is endless.
People are not just one way, they come with good and bad things. It’s a pack.
When you move in together, you buy the whole pack.
4. You will mature
Even if you don’t want to. Living as a couple is one more step towards the grave. It means you are not a child anymore.
Be careful with what you do, it directly affects another person now.
Shag: the website of the million partners…friends
Moving in with your partner is complicated. Many time it does not work. So if that’s the case Shag is a web to flirt and have friends with benefits, you know what I mean.
Cohabiting relationship seekers are not the general users of our site. That said, statistically speaking, there have been some couples made since we started.
Just by filling in a profile, you can receive messages and start looking for profiles you like and contact their owners.
Joining is totally free.
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