Bored in a relationship? This is what happens

Written by Rosie Brooks Tips for couples

Bored in a relationship

It’s okay to feel a bit bored with life in general, with routine and with the people around us. However, if this state is perpetuated, it begins to affect our health and generate a feeling of dissatisfaction that is difficult to bear.

Is it normal for a relationship to be boring?

Boredom is not a plague, but a completely normal state in some moments of life. Getting bored with your partner just means that the time has come to introduce novelties and variations to revive the relationship.  

Most people are afraid of boredom because they see it as a state of sadness, pessimism and negativity that leads to depression. However, this emotion has a positive side that many do not know how to recognize.  

Boredom is the gap that allows the other pieces of the puzzle to move. When we think about how to combat that boredom, ideas arise that we can -and should- take advantage of.  

Some studies have concluded that a person with few activities in life or with little to do can feel bored in various ways.  

However, this does not mean that they have ceased to be passionate about life.  

In most cases, boredom is a way of expressing our needs for adventure, change, and progress.

What are the signs of a boring relationship?

Sometimes they are obvious and sometimes not so much. Here are the most common signs that you’re in a boring relationship

  • You are not interested in your partner’s life, feelings or interests.  
  • You don’t pay as much attention to each other as you did at the beginning of your relationship.  
  • Thinking about the future of your relationship makes you feel uncomfortable or unhappy.  
  • You find that spending time with other people is much more enjoyable and exciting.  
  • You find it hard to find things to talk about.  
  • You argue constantly.
Being bored in a relationship

Bored in a relationship: the solution is right under your nose

Being bored in a relationship is generally seen as a serious red flag. The first idea that comes to mind is that love is over.

Those who have “old school” relationships know that this is not the case. Today people break up at the first opportunity. But sometimes you have to fight for what you once wanted.  

Love and boredom of the other are realities that often coexist, even if they seem contradictory. Moreover, it has been shown that a relationship cannot live on pure passion and that, to maintain it, the love of mediocre days is necessary.  

An established relationship is not one of novelty or closeness, so it is natural for both partners to feel bored with the other person. 

Why? Some people ask the question, but the answer is very simple

It’s normal to get bored with the other person because we often see that person and the way they live is better known to us than that of others. We also know them better, and therefore we know better their limitations, their little quirks and faults, and all this becomes a factor of boredom.  

Even if it is a relationship that has been going on many years, the couple can avoid falling into boredom. The two members of the relationship can do a lot to avoid getting bored with the other person and get out of that state.  

Although some of the things that can be done to avoid these types of problems may seem obvious, many times they are not done because the couple does not believe that this is necessary.   

Don’t stand with your arms crossed. If you get bored with your partner, it is because you have not done much on your part to get out of that state and you are missing many opportunities to improve your relationship. Instead of sitting idly by, you can do a lot of things to improve it.  

You can take the first step yourself.  

If you don’t know how, here we will tell you some of the things you can do to get your partner out of boredom.

overcome boredom in a relationship

How to overcome boredom in a relationship

If you are wondering how to overcome boredom in a relationship, don’t worry, there are a thousand things to do when your relationship is getting boring.  We are going to put the three most important.

1. Travel

There are various reasons why traveling is a good idea to overcome boredom in a relationship

  • First of all, traveling allows you to get to know your partner in a deeper way. Since you are in a new and different environment, you learn more about their likes, dislikes and how they behave in general. This is especially helpful if your relationship is getting boring   
  • Secondly, traveling helps you relax and forget about everyday problems. Whether you’re having a bad day at work or you’ve had a fight with your partner, a vacation together will help you forget about all that and focus on what really matters: your relationship.  
  • Third, traveling gives you the opportunity to do things together that you might not otherwise be able to do. Whether it’s visiting a new country, learning about a new culture, or just spending a few days at the beach, traveling is a great way to enrich your relationship.

2. Begin a new activity together

There are millions of activities a couple can try to overcome boredom in a relationship. Cooking classes, book clubs, porn viewing, hiking groups… the list is endless.

  • Starting a new activity together is a wonderful exercise in overcoming boredom in a relationship as a couple because it gives both of you a chance to discover something new together.  
  • You may discover things about yourselves and your relationship that you never considered before.  
  • It also gives you the opportunity to set new goals and objectives as a couple and work together to achieve them.
Give yourselves space

3. Give yourselves space

Freedom is one of the most precious goods of the human being. Living as a couple does not mean living in a prison, constantly in the company of the other. Moreover, the couples that last are those in which both have a parcel of freedom apart from the other person.

  • Giving each other space to do things separately is an excellent exercise to leave behind boredom in the couple, since it allows each person time to focus on their own interests and passions.  
  • This can help the couple feel more connected and on the same page, as they will have more interesting topics of conversation to share. On the other hand, being without the other person invites you to miss them.  
  • It is also a way to respect and value each other’s independence, which is essential for a healthy and lasting relationship.

Is your relationship getting boring? Shag: the perfect antidote

Communication is the ultimate weapon against boredom. Maybe all the problems of boredom in your relationship would vanish with an open relationship. Have you thought about it? Maybe you love your partner, but you’re dying to have casual sex with other people.  

Don’t torture yourself: it’s normal.  

It’s not an easy topic to talk about, but the good news is that there are thousands of couples on Shag looking for all kinds of relationships.  

Why don’t you tell yours?   

Bored in a relationship?
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Bored in a relationship?
Do you feel like your relationship is getting boring? You don't know how to fix it? In Shag we have the solution, do you want to know it? I'm sure it will help
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