Open-minded couples and tantric sex: how to last for hours in bed

Written by Rosie Brooks Sex

Tantric sex

One of the most interesting aspects of practicing tantric sex is the dry orgasm or, in other words, orgasm with no ejaculation. When you meet women, your only limit will be your physical endurance.

Wikipedia says: “Tantra or tantrism is one of the various esoteric oriental traditions which teach how to use material desire with a spiritual purpose.”

But, what exactly lies behind this mysterious and vague definition? Could it be used as an online flirting technique? Definitely not. Are you sure about that? Maybe it could be used…

Tantra can help you in each and every aspect of your life. In  your social life, your professional life, your family life and above all, your personal life. Think about this, Shag is a social network to meet people at a distance right? But is it just that or is that just the beginning?

Tantric sex is just a small part of all the traditional life phylosophy of Tantra, but we, Shag, are going to focus only on that part for obvious reasons. At our offices we are sure you would like to learn about specific techniques that will make pleasure in your sexual relationships (which you can find thanks to our website) raise to a higher level.

Tantra also works for couples who have lost their spark in bed or in the relationship or for just anyone who is willing to try. Sometimes a relationship is over, but other times it is about innovating, changing, creating together. That’s what tantra is for.

Scientific certainties and myths of Tantrism

Tantrism was born in the East 4000 years ago but it has not been until more or less a decade ago that it has experienced an unprecedented boom in our country. Thus, it is quite easy to suppose that, as with all fashions, phonies will emerge willing to make money with lies.

Other ways of creating myths is the misinterpretation of the sacred scriptures where they describe the techniques and procedures to achieve enlightenment through tantra. Being something like a religion there is a lot of metaphor, a lot of allegory in the sacred texts. They, of course,  do not have to be interpreted literally.

myths tantric sex

Some myths

1. You can have orgasms just by looking into someone else’s eyes. False. What happens is that tantra talks about having sex using the five senses and that includes taking notice of everything, such as your partner’s gaze. It is easy for two people practicing tantric sex to desire to look into each other’s eyes, especially during orgasm, but this does not mean that doing that, looking into each other’s eyes, causes it. 

2. You need a minimum of 3 or 4 hours for the experience to be complete. False. In tantric sexual intercourse, the time a person can be without ejaculating can be increased (and is in fact increased), even if the person is having orgasms. That does not mean that it is necessary to stay that long until you achieve it. 

3. The only goal is to delay ejaculation as long as possible. False. That can be one of the goals, if you want it that way. But tantric sex is not only that. It doesn’t just talk about improving your performance in bed.

What science confirms

Even though it is an ancient philosophy, and that its postulates are thousands of years old, it is only now that science is beginning to confirm some things related to Tantrism. In addition, tantrism includes the practice of Yoga and meditation, two oriental techniques that also provide numerous benefits.  

1. Reduces stress. Meditation and yoga stop the runaway burning train that our mind is most of the time. The short, medium and long term benefits are obvious. Being at peace with yourself is something that will come in handy when it comes to flirting with people. 

2. Increase strength. The regular practice of yoga and tantric sex will increase your work capacity, for sure. 

3. Increase resistance. You will spend more time doing what you like. 

4. Increase flexibility. Which is vital when it comes to having sex without commitment with a man or woman you’ve met through Shag. 

5. Increase your sexual ability. Because the sum of all the previous ones has an obvious consequence in this point.

foundations of Tantrism

The five foundations of Tantrism

As we have said before, tantra is not only a technique to improve sexual performance, but also a whole philosophy of life. This philosophy could be summarized in five basic pillars. On them rests everything else. If you internalise this knowledge and put it into practice, meeting people, flirting with girls, having sex without commitment, will be things as natural for you as eating or breathing.  

  1. First foundation: Know yourself and others. Accept yourself. If you do not accept yourself, with your good and bad things, with your body as it is, with your complexes and fears, you will never enjoy sex, and life in general, 100%. 
  2. Second foundation: Use the five senses. In all aspects of your life, but it can be extrapolated to sex. If you take notice, if you use the five senses, your sexual relations will be much more satisfactory. 
  3. Third foundation: Be present. Don’t waste time thinking about past mistakes or anticipating future fears. You only live the present. The best way to do this is to follow point two and ask yourself this question: What is happening to me right now?  
  4. Fourth foundation: Communicate what you feel and think. Each one practices sex as best as they can, according to previous life experiences. Therefore, each person has their likes and preferences, their tastes. The best way to find out is to ask your partner what they like and what they don’t like. Your sporadic sexual encounters will be much better this way. And if they ask you questions, be honest. Everything will be much better. 
  5. Fifth foundation: Flow. Although it seems like pretty vague advice, it is not. It’s about not resisting things, including your inner voice. For example, if something tells you that your current partner is not worth it, do not fight for the remains of a relationship that is exhausted. In the sexual act the philosophy is the same. You have to perform harmonious and fluid movements so that the women or men with whom you have sporadic sex come out with a good opinion of it.

How to contain ejaculation and have an orgasm at the same time?

One of the most saleable assets of the practice of tantrism is the promise that you will be able to have equally powerful orgasms without ejaculating. There are a number of ways to get there, and none are mystical at all. Pay attention, because it will come in handy in case you have a date with a woman (married or not) from Shag.  

1. Kegel exercises for men

Kegel exercises are used to strengthen and control all the pubococcygeal muscles, something vital when it comes to cutting off ejaculation.  

  • When you urinate, you have to stop the flow by contracting your muscles several times. The frequency and duration of the cuts will depend on several factors, such as the state of your muscles. 
  • Another technique is to reach the point of no return and, just before ejaculating, stop, breathe deeply and contract the muscles until you return to the previous phase.  

Using these simple physical techniques and, as in any exercise, perseverance, there will come a time when you will have an orgasm and can stop the flow of semen at the same time. So your only limit will be physical exhaustion, not the emotional, physical, and spiritual emptiness that most people feel when they ejaculate.

Kegel exercises for men

2. Kegel exercises for women

Although Kegel exercises are used by most women to treat urinary incontinence and to strengthen the pelvic floor after childbirth, performing these exercises also increases the pleasure of intercourse.   

  • The star exercise would be to introduce an appropriate object into the vagina and “hold” it with its walls for a certain time, after which she relaxes and “releases” it. But there are many more.
kegel exercises for women

Breathing well with your partner to get to know your partner well.  

What do we mean by this? Well, to have a quality tantric sex session it is vitally important that you synchronize your breathing with that of your partner

According to the ancient Eastern teachings, breathing is one of the fundamental parts linked to personal well-being, your health and, consequently, your sexual vigor. 

So, when you have sex with a Shag user interested in tantrism, you should match your breathing with his or hers. Interesting, right?  

You wouldn’t have imagined that you also have to use your lungs consciously and actively to have sex?  

There are many ways to drive a woman crazy in bed, but tantra is one of the most effective.

Total Synchronization Technique: Sit in front of your partner and look into each other’s eyes. Slowly breathe in, slowly filling your lungs and pulling your belly out. This is called breathing using the diaphragm. Caress each other while looking into your eyes and being aware of the flow of air that enters and leaves your bodies. Focus on the massages. They have to be stimulating, not relaxing, but without being too direct, in order to prolong the pleasure.
Kundalini energy tantric sex

The Kundalini energy

Tantrism is a philosophy or set of oriental beliefs that has come to the West to stay, which is why a process of “adaptation” to our language and lifestyle has been necessary.  

The Kundalini energy is what makes you advance spiritually and is capable of freeing your mind from prejudices and ties. Its function is to unblock fears and end bad life habits. In sexuality it is presented as the energy that will unblock all the chakras, since the Kundalini energy starts from the first and unblocks all of them until it connects with the last.  

Do not be scared, speaking plainly, this means that we all have a lot of sexual energy and that we have to channel it. In fact, an emotional block, conscious or unconscious, will not allow you to channel this energy well. That’s what it means.  

The truth is that tantra will be useful to meet people, to have satisfactory sexual experiences, to improve self-esteem and, therefore, the opinion you have about yourself.  

Do you know how many Shag users practice tantric sex? More than 2000. Spread throughout the UK. What are you waiting for to complete the free registration?

Tantric sex: how to last for hours in bed
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Tantric sex: how to last for hours in bed
Do you know what tantric sex is? Would you like to have sex for hours? Keep reading and learn how to achieve it with Shag's advice, your partner will thank you
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